There are five key elements that can make or break your attempt at successful non-verbal communication in business:
- eye contact
- gestures
- movement
- posture, and
- Written communication
Let’s examine each nonverbal element in turn to see how we can maximize its potential to communicate effectively…
eye contact
Good eye contact helps your audience develop trust in you, which helps you and your message appear credible. Poor eye contact does the exact opposite.
So what is “good” eye contact?
People rely on visual cues to help them decide whether or not to pay attention to a message. If they find that someone is not ‘looking’ at them when they are being spoken to, they feel uncomfortable.
Therefore, he is a wise business communicator who tries to attract all members of the audience by looking at them.
Now, this is of course easy if the audience is just a handful of people, but in an auditorium it can be a much more difficult task. So balance your time between these three areas:
- slowly scanning the entire audience,
- focus on particular areas of your audience (perhaps staring at the wall between two heads if you’re still intimidated by public speaking), and
- looking at individual audience members for about five seconds per person.
Looking at individual members of a large group can be ‘tricky’ to get right at first.
Similarly, it can be a good balancing act if your audience is made up of only one or two members: spend too much time looking them in the eye and they will feel intimidated, watched, ‘hounded’.
So here’s a helpful tip: Cut your eye contact down to four- or five-second snippets.
That is, look at the other person for four to five second blocks, then look away. That way they won’t feel intimidated.
Practice this time yourself, away from others. Just look at a spot on the wall, count to five, and then look away. With practice, you’ll develop a ‘feel’ for how long you’ve been looking into your audience’s eyes, and you’ll intuitively know when to look away and focus on another person or object.
When concentrating on individual members in a large meeting or auditorium, try to geographically distribute your attention throughout the room. That is, don’t just focus your personal gaze (as opposed to when you’re scanning the room or looking at sections of the room) on selected individuals from just one part of the room. Unless you’re specifically looking to engage with a particular person at that point in your presentation, select individual eye contact audience members from across the room.
gestures
Most of us, when talking to our friends, use our hands and face to help us describe an event or object – powerful non-verbal cues.
We wave our arms, turn our hands from side to side, roll our eyes, raise our eyebrows, and smile or frown.
Yet many of us too, when we introduce ourselves to others in a more formal setting, keep quiet.
Our friends audience is no different from our business audience: they all rely on our face and hands (and sometimes legs, feet, and other parts of us!) to ‘see’ the bigger, fuller picture.
It’s totally understandable that our nervousness can cause us to “freeze,” but it’s best for us and our communication if we manage that nervousness, manage our fear of public speaking, and use our bodies to help make our point.
I found that by joining a local Toastmasters International club I was able to quickly learn how to ‘set my body free’ by presenting myself to others.
movement
Have you ever seen great presenters in action, men and women who are alone on stage but make us laugh, cry and get carried away with their words and enthusiasm?
Watch them closely and you’ll notice that they don’t stand rigidly in one place. No, they jump, run, walk and slide all over the stage.
Why do they do that?
Because they know that human beings, in particular men, are attracted to movement.
As part of the genetic inheritance of man, we are programmed to pay attention to movement. We instantly notice it, whether we like it or not, assessing movement for any hint of threat to us.
This, of course, helps explain why so many men are drawn to television and seem transfixed by it. It also helps explain why men in particular are almost ‘glued’ to the television when sports are on. All that movement!
But to get back on stage and you on it… make sure any movement you make is meaningful and not just a nervous fidget, like rocking back and forth on your heels or taking two steps forward and back, or Side to side.
This is a ‘jittery move’ and your jitters will be transmitted to your audience, significantly diluting the potency of your communication and message.
So move around the stage when you can, not only to keep the men in the audience happy, but to help emphasize your message!
Position
There are two types of ‘posture’ and it is the wise communicator who manages and uses both.
posture 1
The first type of ‘posture’ is the one we intuitively think of: back straight vs. slumped shoulders; confident posture with feet apart binds the feet, twisting the hands of the nervous; head up and smiling versus head down and frowning.
And each of the positions in which we place the various elements of our body tells a story, a powerful non-verbal story.
For example, stand tall, with your shoulders straight, your head up, and your eyes looking straight ahead. He wears a big smile. Notice how you ‘feel’ emotionally.
Now lower your shoulders, look at the floor and slightly move your feet. Again, take note of your emotional state.
Notice the difference?
Your audience will surely do so and will react to you and your message accordingly.
A strong, upright, and positive body posture not only helps you breathe easier (good for helping calm your nerves!), but also conveys a message of authority, confidence, and power.
If you’re challenged to hold that posture, practice in front of a mirror or, better yet, join a public speaking club like Toastmasters International. [http://www.toastmastersa.org/champion/index.html].
posture 2
The second type of ‘posture’ comes from your internal mental and emotional states.
You can have a great body posture, but without an internal mental and emotional posture, your words will ring hollow to your audience.
For example, the used car salesman at ‘Dodgy Brothers Motors’ might have excellent body posture and greet you with a firm handshake, a steady gaze, and a friendly smile. But if in his heart he sees you as just another fool, sooner or later his internal conflict between what he says and what he really thinks will cause him to “stumble”.
His body will begin to betray his true underlying intentions and you will begin to feel uncomfortable around him, even if you don’t know why.
But, if that same used car salesman had a genuine desire to help you find the right car for you, and puts your needs before his own, then his words and actions will remain congruent (in harmony) with his underlying intentions and you. trust him, even though you may not be able to identify why.
I’ve seen some so-called ‘self-help’ gurus who don’t actually practice what they preach. Consequently, your words ring hollow to me, and your books, CDs, DVDs, and training materials remain unpurchased.
I’ve met salesmen and saleswomen who don’t actually make the money they claim to make on their ‘fabulous business opportunity’, and although their words are practiced and polished, and their body posture is ‘perfect’, their words ooze like syrupy poison. from his lips and I’m still not convinced.
This second type of ‘stance’ is fundamentally linked to truth and honesty. It’s about ‘walking the talk’ and being who you say you are.
It’s about not trying to sell something you don’t believe in or don’t use yourself. It’s about not trying to pass yourself off as an expert when all you’ve done is read a book on the subject.
It’s about making sure your words and intentions are backed by truth and honesty. Because all of us, no matter how polished presenters we may be, are at the mercy of our bodies and their ability to ‘tell the truth’ despite what our lips may utter. Nonverbal Clues Rule!
Written communication
I could spend my life writing about the art of written communication.
There is an art (and also a science) that can be learned with diligence and practice. Writing too formally; write too informally; write too briefly; write too much…
My first suggestion would be to take advantage of one of the following three books, each of which is absolutely brilliant at giving you the skills and knowledge to write business effectively:
- The Business Style Manual: An A-Z Guide to Writing at Work with Tips from Fortune 500 Communications Experts by Helen Cunningham and Brenda Greene
- The Elements of Business Writing: A Guide to Writing Clear and Concise Letters, Memos, Reports, Proposals, and Other Business Documents by Gary Blake and Robert W. Bly
- Effective Business Writing: Strategies, Tips, and Examples by Maryann V. Piotrowski
From persuasive memos to complaint letters, sales letters, and executive summaries, these extremely helpful guides help you write clearly and in an appropriate format, style, and tone. Each book has numerous examples showing how to overcome writer’s block, organize messages for maximum impact, achieve an easy-to-read style, find an efficient writing system, and much more.
In conclusion…
There are five key elements that can make or break your attempt at successful non-verbal business communication:
- eye contact
- gestures
- movement
- posture, and
- Written communication
Non-verbal communication in a business environment requires not only recognition of these elements, but also the confidence to face their challenges.
Good luck and remember to communicate with passion!
