There was a time in every parent’s life when going out was fun: a trip to the grocery store was enjoyable, maybe even an enjoyable activity to spend with a spouse. The cinema, then a stop for a drink afterwards. Go out to dinner anytime, whether it’s 6:30 on a Friday night or 10:00 pm on weekdays. Seems like back then there wasn’t really a care in the world.
And then the children arrived.
Now, an outing is a planned, restless and cumbersome task, which is sure to be full of stress, mess and the need to change clothes. Go to the grocery store? Might as well be packing up and going to war. The bookstore? A sedative might be in order. Some kind of social gathering? I better hope grandma and grandpa are there too, or there’s NO WAY you’re going to socialize at that gathering!
But when it comes down to it, parents have to get out of the house. Outings with the little ones are inevitable. So why not make them manageable? There are a lot of things to remember when planning and executing an outing with young children. These are some of the things I’ve found to get everyone home in one piece, and we stay a little crazy, rather than completely crazy, to the bottom, read about it in the paper the next day fan.
o Pack of snacks and drinks. These should keep them busy for at least a few minutes, and maybe all that whining is just because they’re hungry!
o Don’t have high expectations. If it’s the grocery store, only buy what you need if you’re alone.
o Always keep toys stowed away: in the car, in your purse, in your diaper bag, under your shirt. You never know when or where you will need them.
o If possible, tag team. One adult for each child. If possible…
o If it is a single adult, have a double stroller ready. It can be huge and painful to push, but you have kids! Who said this was going to be a walk in the park? Double strollers keep multiple children in one place, much easier to manage.
o Going in and out, especially if the kids seem a bit fussy. Sorry, the days of leisure shopping are over!
o Pay attention to naps and plan accordingly. Children are creatures of routine, regardless of age.
BE FLEXIBLE! Enough talk! If the outing doesn’t go as planned, just get over it and don’t freak out. Leave that for the little ones.
o Give them a reward when your children behave appropriately in public. It could be just a lollipop or a sticker. They will feel important.
o If your little ones are upset, remember the obvious “stressors”: diapering, feeding, comfort. Is one of these things the problem? Those are all pretty easy to fix.
or did I mention snacks?
or Tie them in some way. A child who goes crazy is only looking for trouble. On a stroller, trolley, front bag, maybe even one of those child straps. And if he has two, more reason for contention. Don’t forget you were born with only two arms.
o Incentives to behave: “After the supermarket, we can go to the park!”
or Madness from time to time. If you act silly, children tend to laugh. Laughing is much better than yelling. People will look at you and smile, instead of looking at you and shaking their heads in disapproval.
or Stimulate them! It’s okay to walk past the toys, the ice cream, that dog in front of the store. Give the little ones something to look at and enjoy.
or Keep talking. Hold on to the attention of your little ones.
o Use positive reinforcement. Instead of just yelling and saying ‘no’ when little ones misbehave, why not praise them when they’re good?
o Get a babysitter once in a while. Sometimes you really need to book some of the adults-only outings. This includes dates with your spouse, if you are married. Very important!
Finally, going out with the little ones can be an arduous task, but you can make them less hectic, maybe even fun. After all, you are a parent, so you must have some supernatural powers. Think of something your child likes to do outside the house and use it on the outing. If you go shopping at the supermarket, stop by the park. If it’s a stop at the shoe store, maybe go to the mall and then stop at the pet store. Enter the children’s section of the bookstore. A doctor’s appointment can be followed by a stop at the ice cream parlor. Why not reward your little ones when they exhibit appropriate outgoing behavior? And why not reward yourself too? Who doesn’t like ice cream?
